Showing results by narrator "Paul Panting" in All Categories

Sure, some parents are embarrassing - but they’re nothing on this lot. These 10 tales of the world’s most spectacularly silly mums and deliriously daft dads will leave you rocking with laughter. Pinch your nose for Peter Pong, the man with the stinkiest feet in the world...jump out of the way of Harriet Hurry, the fastest mum on two wheels...watch out for Monty Monopolize, the dad who takes all his kids' toys...and oh no, it’s Supermum! Brandishing a toilet brush, a mop and a very bad homemade outfit....

The masters of the Doom Eagles Space Marines Chapter descend upon the world of Tranzia to honour a batch of new recruits who will lead the Chapter into the next generation. As they make planetfall, the world rises up against them in a rebellion organised by the alien Tau. But something else lurks behind the xenos, a horror that has haunted the Imperium since its very beginnings. The Doom Eagles and their Adepta Sororitas allies are thrust into a race against time to discover the true architect of the Tranzia Rebellion.

The beloved World’s Worst series has captivated millions of readers. You’ve met the world’s worst children, the world’s worst parents, the world’s worst teachers and the world’s worst pets – but are you ready for the world’s worst monsters? If you don’t like ghosts, ogres, zombies, vampires, aliens, werewolves or mummies, DO NOT LISTEN TO THIS BOOK. Laugh along to these ten terrifying tales of marvellous monsters, brought to you by David Walliams.

The year is 3020. Pip@256X#YY.3_7 is lonely and bored: she goes to virtual school on her G-Glasses, she has only a talking cat and parrot to hang out with and she can’t even leave her LivingSpace due to the extreme heat and floods outside. Until the day that Pip explores a glowing ring in a lab and finds herself in a warehouse, in 2019. Where she meets boy-inventor Rahul – who is also lonely and bored. Together, Rahul and Pip are no longer lonely. But they have a whole load of new problems.

Ben is getting used to life without his beloved granny. She was a cabbage enthusiast, a Scrabble partner...and an international jewel thief known as the Black Cat. Now, only the memory of their extraordinary adventure to steal the Crown Jewels lives on. Then something inexplicable happens. World-famous treasures are stolen in the dead of night and the clues point to none other than...the Black Cat? Expect the unexpected in this adventure, which will have listeners on the edge of their seats as they join Ben on his quest to unravel the mystery of the return of the Black Cat.

Three brilliantly funny stories from the best-selling author David Baddiel. The Person Controller - Fred and Ellie are twins. But not identical (because that's impossible for a boy and a girl). They do like all the same things, though. Especially video games. Birthday Boy - This is the story of Sam Green, who really, really, really loves birthdays. He loves the special breakfasts in bed. Future Friend - The year is 3020. Pip@256X#YY.3_7 is lonely and bored: she goes to virtual school on her G-Glasses.

A story of prejudice and acceptance, funny lists and silly words, this new book has all the hallmarks of David’s previous best sellers. Our hero Ben is bored beyond belief after he is made to stay at his grandma’s house. She’s the boringest grandma ever: all she wants to do is to play Scrabble and eat cabbage soup. But there are two things Ben doesn’t know about his grandma.

The Parent Agency is an epic wish-fulfilment adventure for every child - and for the child in everyone. Head Kid tells the story of Ryan Ward, the maestro of practical jokes. The new head teacher, Mr Carter, arrives. A man so strict even the teachers are scared of him. So imagine his surprise - and Ryan’s - when they swap bodies.

Having escaped from Hong Kong, the five gatekeepers - Matt, Pedro, Scott, Jamie and Scarlett - are lost in a hostile and dangerous world. As they struggle to regroup and plan their next move, the malevolent King of the Old Ones gathers his forces in Oblivion: a desolate landscape where the last survivors of humanity must fight the ultimate battle.

The Taylor Turbochaser is a road-trip roller coaster...with a twist. At its heart is the unforgettable Amy Taylor. Amy loves cars, and dreams of being a driver. But there’s a major catch: her slow old wheelchair with its broken wheel. When Amy finally gets a new electric one, it’s exciting...at first. But standard engines only have so much power. And that’s where Rahul comes in - Amy’s best friend and genius inventor. Soon Rahul turns a wheelchair into...a supercar!

From the million-copy bestselling author of The Parent Agency and Birthday Boy comes a wildly entertaining wish-fulfilment adventure that asks the question: what would happen if the strictest head teacher swapped bodies with the naughtiest kid in school?

Meet Grace Bernard. Daughter, sister, colleague, friend, serial killer. Grace has lost everything. And now she wants revenge.

Nothing extraordinary has ever happened to Billy Smith. In fact, every single thing about him is ordinary, including his name. But when a documentary crew turns up at Billy’s school to film the new TV series School Daze, everything changes. Billy shouldn’t stand out: all the other kids are much more interesting than him. But when remixes of his boring class presentation go viral, Billy finds himself accidentally an overnight star.

After his experiences at Raven's Gate, 14-year-old Matt Freeman thinks his days of battling evil are over. But he is pulled into another horrifying adventure when he discovers a second gate exists. Matt and his friend Richard travel to Peru and, assisted by a secret organisation known as the Nexus, follow a series of clues to the gate's whereabouts. But there is a traitor in the Nexus.... Richard is kidnapped. Matt manages to escape with the help of Pedro, a local boy.

It used to be the most WONDERFUL time of the year, but for years Christmas has been taken over by Winterzone. All the things that made Christmas special are gone. Instead, Christmas is run by robots, while 3D holograms of Santa Claus called Santavatars check if you’ve been naughty or nice—and on Christmas Eve, all of the presents are delivered by ZoneDrones instead of Santa’s reindeer! But when they stumble on a curious clue, eleven-year-old Etta and her friend Monty find themselves thrown into a fight to bring back Christmas.

Evil has been unleashed on the world and only five children - with special powers - can save it. Matt and the other three desperately need to find Scar, the final gatekeeper, who has been trapped in Hong Kong, where puddles of water turn into puddles of blood, where ghosts, demons and hideous creatures stalk the streets. Matt has no choice but to follow her. Now, both imprisoned, their only hope of survival is to reach a secret door in the Man Ho temple. But even if Scar can find her psychic power, it may already be too late.

Unbeknownst to anyone, somewhat-unhappy and never-quite-fitting-in 10-year-old Eddie Albert can speak to animals, including his pet dog Butch, his hamster and his two goldfish (who claim they were once pirates). But when Eddie is sent to stay with his eccentric aunt in Amsterdam, he discovers that she too has this gift.... So begins a breathless cosmopolitan comic crime adventure, as Eddie, Aunt Budge, his new friend Flo and a whole gang of amazing animals take on the most dastardly villain Amsterdam has ever seen, in a desperate race against time to save one of their own.

Eddie and best friend Flo are spending the Easter holidays on the Romney Marshes with Aunt Budge and all his animals—Butch the dog, Bunty the hamster and pirate goldfish Dan and Jake. When the terrible Rancid Twins arrive in town, set on uncovering the secret mystery of the smugglers’ treasure, Eddie and Flo are drawn into a thrilling new adventure. Eddie must use his ability to speak to animals to enlist the help of two elegant alpaca, a friendly sheep called Doris and a famous film-star rabbit to save the day and reveal a treasure of epic proportions.

The first book in a super new series by best-selling author and queen of comedy Jeanne Willis. Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No! It's...Supercat! After chowing down on a toxic sock lazy fat cat Tiger feels a bit funny.... Well, actually, he feels spectacular! He is no longer Tiger, he is Supercat! Now he can speak, drive, ride a bike, and even fly (just kidding - a flying cat would be ridiculous!). Join Supercat and his best buddy, James, in their first adventure as they try to stop the villainous Count Backwards from taking over the world! 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 - Go!

Thrilling adventures and hilarious capers from three brilliant children’s authors in one audiobook collection. That Time I Got Kidnapped. When 14-year-old Jacob misses his connecting flight in Chicago, he tries to complete his journey to LA by Greyhound bus. But on board he meets American teenager Jennifer, who is carrying a mysterious package and being chased by an enigmatic pursuer known only as ‘the Cowboy’...and she needs a partner in crime. The unlikely pair soon finds themselves on the road-trip of a lifetime - a funny, filmic, gripping adventure.